Doesn’t mammo [my grandmother] have that? Does grandma? Grampa has that, doesn’t he? What IS that?
What IS E.D., anyway? What does it mean? Why are you turning red like that? How come? Oooooooh, his PENIS is…broken?…wait…how does a penis get broken?
What’s an erection? What’s it for? Well, how long is it SUPPOSED to last? Because four hours isn’t very long, or it isn’t when you’re playing but I suppose if you have an erection and you’re in school….Mommy? Why are you laughing so hard? Oh! Are you going to make one of those drinks now with the red juice and the orange juice and the clear stuff that smells like a doctor’s office? Can I have one without the clear stuff? And can I have a cherry in it? And what IS an erection, anyway?
Mommy, are YOU healthy enough for sexual activity? Because your back sure does hurt a lot…wow! You can spit REALLY FAR! There’s red juice all the way over here…I'll get the towel! Do I get points for cleaning this up?!
Oh yeah. It was loads of fun and a great opportunity for me to prove how Progressive! and also Hip! I am, as a mother. Pushing the boundaries of my comfort-zone, while simultaneously giving my kids excellent topics for their next Sunday School session. “Hey, guess what? Sometimes if you have too much fat, you might get a medicine and have erections!”
You know it will happen, and thank goodness for it. Nothing says “progressive society” like a six year old discussing priapism in her Sunday School.
I’d like to thank you in person for giving me this growth opportunity. If you would kindly leave your names, phone numbers, physical addresses and times when you would be alone someplace with no