Saturday, February 20, 2021

Every year...

Every year, I get the notification that the domain registration is due for this all-but-forgotten blog domain. 

Every year, I go through the same thought process: Should I even keep this? I haven't blogged anything in literally years, maybe it's time to just let it go

And then I go ahead and pay it, because I can't stop believing that eventually, I will get back to blogging again. 

OK. Y'all. I just wrote 68 words, and was interrupted five times. FIVE. People shouting to each other right outside my door. Coming into my office with announcements. Asking me if I bought the stuff from the place on the link that they sent me. Weaving complicated webs of who is going where and with whom and for how long

That settles it. I have to keep this Den of Chaos domain. It isn't just a cute little phrase, it is my entire life condensed into three little words. 

So. I suppose I should try to catch things up a bit... 

All but one of the Denizens are now legally adults, but are all still living here with us...which brings its own set of challenges as they appear to have stepped into Krazy Glue and have been unable to leave the nest. One of the most frustrating things about the COVID-19 fiasco has been that my daughters who had just discovered their wings got them clipped right as they were learning to love being able to soar on their own. 

"Go forth, my children, and enjoy your freed-...wait, no, come back and stay put..." 

I left my job with MegaBank almost two years ago due to a very long and complicated list of reasons, and have been volunteering full time with an animal rescue since shortly after I turned in my badge. 

Over the course of 2020, I was able to upgrade the technology for the rescue, redesign the website, digitize a decade worth of paperwork, facilitate over five hundred cat and kitten adoptions in 2020, fostered thirty-two kittens, and took over the role when our treasurer left us. 

I really wish that more people could have this kind of "gap period" experience, especially people like me who have "expensive" skills. The barrier to entry for most itty-bitty nonprofits isn't the price of the software or hosting, it's the salaries of people like me to set them up and maintain them that puts them out of reach. It's been an absolute delight to spend my days doing not only what I love to be doing, but for a cause that is near and dear to my heart.

Plus, I get to have kittens in the house almost all the time. #LiterallyBestPerksEver.

Volunteering also did wonders for my burnout, which had gotten really bad before I left MegaBank...but before you jump to conclusions, it wasn't my job that did it to me. It was the home front that had worn me down to the point where I just didn't have a drop of fuel left in the tank.

If I'm honest, I'm still smoldering a bit. It took a long time for my burnout to start mimicking depression, so I guess it is only reasonable to expect that it will take an equally long time for me to regain my energy and interest in doing things, but, well, patience has never exactly been my strong suit.

The garden is in ruins. The house isn't much better. I have a lot of work to do if I want to get things back to where they were back in 2016, before the burnout started eroding away both my physical ability and emotional interest in keeping on top of things. 

Guess it's time to roll up my sleeves and get going. I know what I want my life to look like, and I'm not going to get there by sitting here grousing about the steps not doing themselves.


mereth said...

The value of a feed reader is when someone you loved reading suddenly pops up again. I loved knowing about the shenanigans going on in your family and thought life had got just toooo chaotic to keep up the blog. Glad to know you're still all around. Even a yearly post would be welcomed.
I blog very sporadically because of changed family circumstances but still hold out hope for the future.

Wogglebug said...

Welcome back! I sometimes wondered what you were doing these days.

Wow, if your kids are mostly grown, time really has flown!

Yes, constant kittens sounds like a Best Perk Ever.

ccr in MA said...

I'm glad to see you pop back up again, even if it is once a year. Glad to hear that you're hanging in. And kittens! Best perk ever!

Anna said...

I'm glad your still blogging. I was just thinking about you the other day. I've recently taken up knitting and was remembering all your stories about it here and on the Fool.

Hopefully life will allow you to blog more often.

Monday's Child said...

Greetings to the best Den Mother ever, whose den now includes a rotating cast of adorable, furry Denizens.

I'm sorry that life ran you over. I'm incredibly glad that you had the ability to do something that helped reawaken your joy. And I'm grateful that you took a moment to come update us all.

Keep taking care of you. Everything else is easier after that... even if none of it is ever easy.


Anonymous said...

It's *really* good to see you back online.